Still thinking about that one. Haven't decided. Haven't thought much either. Thinking is hard. Anyway, strap on your spare liver for this week's edition of "Booze in the News"...

Aristotle, Leonardo daVinci, Martin Luther King Jr., and now: Texas chef and inventor, Mark Zable, has laid claim to the first-ever Deep Fried Beer. A ravioli-like pretzel dough is injected with beer and fried for 20 seconds. I always knew that brewskies were high in calories, but was always disappointed in the low fat content. No longer an issue. Even better, the short cooking time allows this madness to remain alcoholic, thus making it healthier (that's foreshadowing). What I really want to know is how many of these beauties I can fit in a pocket. Finally, all those stupid cargo shorts I bought after seeing a mesmerizing Old Navy ad will come in handy.

The Hillbilly Paradox: It's the biggest news since the 60 Minutes feature on red wine being healthy. A recent Time article released a study claiming that heavy drinkers live longer than non-drinkers. This shocking revelation reinforced evidence that "moderate" drinkers (less than 3 drinks per day...is that moderate?) live the longest, heavy drinkers are second, and foolish teetotalers are the first to go. Sure, perhaps the drys are being snatched away to a heavenly paradise while we boozers toil and writhe in this alcohol-soaked Sodom & Gomorrah, but I'm going to have to quote Billy Joel on this one: "I'd rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints. The sinners are much more fun." Incidentally, the oft-lubricated Mr. Joel was really just a health nut this whole time.

Okra, neat: It was very exciting to see wine (and food, and cocktails) blogger extraordinaire, Southern gentleman, and friend of Suburban Wino Ben Carter's "Okratini" featured as one of Huffington Post's best new cocktail mixers. Ben has supurbly written about all things consumable for over 5 years at Benito's Wine Reviews. While he modestly points out that the concoction is not his own, kudos to the guy for bringing it to the forefront, and- as he often does- sprinkling a little class on a regional favorite. Never had pickled okra? It's great even when not doused with gin and vermouth, but if you have the latter two on hand...